pass me the lighter

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I loved him. But I didn’t love him the way I should have. Every piece of the puzzle that was my existence was broken, scattered, lost. My childhood dreams were swept under the rug while I tried everything in my power to keep my lover satisfied. My passions slowly vanished into thin air, as everything he wanted became everything I wanted. My life goals were put on hold, in fear that he would think I was being selfish, or that he would get bored of my same routine. But my routine stayed boring with every day I stuck to him. I lost everything to him. He consumed my every thought, my every dream, my every word. He was all I cared about. He took all my strength and all my energy.

And then I lost him.

I loved him. But I stopped loving myself. I lost who I was in 5 years. I had to rebuild — or rather, rediscover — who I was before he conquered my every decision. I am slowly but surely relighting my flame. The fire isn’t spreading quite as fast as I’d like it to, but there’s finally light in the room again.

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